Flossy is well known to many on the British Dressage Forum as a teller of interesting stories and perhaps the odd joke or two. We have selected a few tales for your pleasure.
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What did he say
A Dressage Diva returned home from her weekly dressage lesson with a Senior trainer.
From her dishevelled look and the bruised body , one could have thought she just had a cage fighting session with the like of Mike Tyson and not a session of the elegant sport of dressage .
“What happened ?†Dressage husband asked in a very concerned tone of voice.
“It’s all Senior Trainers fault!†she replied , “You know how he is so always so quiet , softly spoken when he is teaching , the more valuable the delivered information is! , quieter his voice becomes. We were warming up for the BD halt only test , I had to stretch my neck and lean towards him in order to hear his priceless words of wisdom, still could not hear a word. I leant further and with my neck stretched like an Emu to one side but still could not hear a word, JUST as I performed the best impersonation of Lester Piggott in a Derby finish, neck down bum up posture , my horse executed a perfect HALT with me leaving the saddle as fast as a shit off the shovel . I landed so hard that the impact was registered in the seismological station as Richter scale level 6 earthquake.
“Pppooooorrr you†was Dressage husband respond “Did you ever find out what was he actually saying ?†he continued.
“ Yes I did “ his wife replied “Just before the impact I heard his voice loud and clear he said not to lean forward so much or I will FALLOFF THE HORSE “