Flossy is well known to many on the British Dressage Forum as a teller of interesting stories and perhaps the odd joke or two. We have selected a few tales for your pleasure.
|
Modern technology
Junior trainer was vindicated , The last article in the horse and hound about down able instruction via ones iPhone has done it.
For years trainers such as JT were criticised for using the mobile during a lesson as disrespectful of their students , in reality it was pioneering modern techniques of delivering instruction which at last been caught on by others and now heavily marketed as the latest state of the art system of developing sporting skills.
Junior trainer was in the firm belief that if a trainer and student enjoyed a healthy relationship (which was paid for) there was no need for endless verbalization during a lesson, a nod of the head or raised eyebrow are sufficient for the well prepared student to understand his trainer .This mode of communication left JT free to brows the internet on his Black berry ,keep in touch with other like minded trainers and even do some trading on the money market when spare cash was available.
With modern technology one can have a lesson from a trainer who has never met you or seen your horse, it is a real confidence builder to know that your trainer of choice is only a click of a mouse or press of a button away .
Junior trainer heard that senior trainer conducts all his training via the telephone and the service is all automated. students while riding dial TT number and are given several options.
To book a lesson press one, please have your credit card details available
For novice level query, press 2,
press 3 for general inquiry about scale of training.
If your question is about advance dressage press 4 and your call will be diverted to Carl Hester.
At times you will be redirected to Top Trainers bedroom (the call) ,toilet, mobile, or , computer . so this service can be available 24/7 from any where in the world.
Should the question be unusual and will require time to reply due to extra high volume of students, a soft up lifting music will be played in tune with your horses footfall ,which can be used for your FS.( for an extra small charge)
Dial 69 for adult conversation, about ROLLKURE , LDR and any other obscene equestrian topic.
It was during a very intense training session Junior was assisting Plump lady from the ground with piaffe work, a long whip in one hand while the other hand was busy texting instruction to a pupil at the other side of the world,
For a split second Juniors attention was not totally on the black stallion and he missed the sight of the left hind leg approaching at a speed of greased lightening straight towards his groin.
Laying on the ground both hands clutching the vitals he wailed “I am hurt I am hurt cancel all my lessons PUT IT ON FACE BOOK , TWITTER, BD FORUM ANY FORUM, THAT ALL MY LESSONS ARE CANCELLED”
“What? shell we put it on the net you have been kicked in the BALLS” asked Plump lady
Trough tears and wails Junior Trainer whimpered “ NO ,NO , JUST SAY I AM NOT WELL say any thing, say I have got AIDS”
“Why Aids of all things?” asked Plump
“Because like this no one will mess around with my boy friend while I am in hospital “ shrieked Junior Trainer
For years trainers such as JT were criticised for using the mobile during a lesson as disrespectful of their students , in reality it was pioneering modern techniques of delivering instruction which at last been caught on by others and now heavily marketed as the latest state of the art system of developing sporting skills.
Junior trainer was in the firm belief that if a trainer and student enjoyed a healthy relationship (which was paid for) there was no need for endless verbalization during a lesson, a nod of the head or raised eyebrow are sufficient for the well prepared student to understand his trainer .This mode of communication left JT free to brows the internet on his Black berry ,keep in touch with other like minded trainers and even do some trading on the money market when spare cash was available.
With modern technology one can have a lesson from a trainer who has never met you or seen your horse, it is a real confidence builder to know that your trainer of choice is only a click of a mouse or press of a button away .
Junior trainer heard that senior trainer conducts all his training via the telephone and the service is all automated. students while riding dial TT number and are given several options.
To book a lesson press one, please have your credit card details available
For novice level query, press 2,
press 3 for general inquiry about scale of training.
If your question is about advance dressage press 4 and your call will be diverted to Carl Hester.
At times you will be redirected to Top Trainers bedroom (the call) ,toilet, mobile, or , computer . so this service can be available 24/7 from any where in the world.
Should the question be unusual and will require time to reply due to extra high volume of students, a soft up lifting music will be played in tune with your horses footfall ,which can be used for your FS.( for an extra small charge)
Dial 69 for adult conversation, about ROLLKURE , LDR and any other obscene equestrian topic.
It was during a very intense training session Junior was assisting Plump lady from the ground with piaffe work, a long whip in one hand while the other hand was busy texting instruction to a pupil at the other side of the world,
For a split second Juniors attention was not totally on the black stallion and he missed the sight of the left hind leg approaching at a speed of greased lightening straight towards his groin.
Laying on the ground both hands clutching the vitals he wailed “I am hurt I am hurt cancel all my lessons PUT IT ON FACE BOOK , TWITTER, BD FORUM ANY FORUM, THAT ALL MY LESSONS ARE CANCELLED”
“What? shell we put it on the net you have been kicked in the BALLS” asked Plump lady
Trough tears and wails Junior Trainer whimpered “ NO ,NO , JUST SAY I AM NOT WELL say any thing, say I have got AIDS”
“Why Aids of all things?” asked Plump
“Because like this no one will mess around with my boy friend while I am in hospital “ shrieked Junior Trainer