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Flossy is well known to many on the British Dressage Forum as a teller of interesting stories and perhaps the odd joke or two. We have selected a few tales for your pleasure.
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Stable staff
Staff issues are something that effects every one in business including those that employ stable staff , in spite of the fact that all those that work with horses choose to do so on their own free will, it is often an up hill struggle to motivate and guide staff to maintain an acceptable level of performance.
The following comments posted on Face Book by yards owners describe the situation to perfection,
“Has anyone designed a clever checklist to help manage yard staff? Or does anyone have any ideas to make sure jobs get done without nagging?”
“We have to oversee everything i'm afraid!”
“If you have to nag then you need to go on a bollocking course! Lo”
A (triple) AAA employees do exist but they are seldom available on the free market due to their UNIX character and skills ,instead those that reply to the staff wanted adverts belong to the tribe that mostly work only if cornered like rats in a trap, they come with a glowing reference which is the only way for their previous employer to pass them on.
The new employers must use an enigma deciphering machine to understand the true message behind the reference .
Here are some real life examples
A typical reference will describe a person as wise and energetic what it will omit to mention is that it is wisdom of youth and energy of old age, or of the one that regularly sets himself (low) standards and still fails to achieve them, I suppose it is better then the employee that completes all tasks to HIS own satisfaction .
In equestrian terms a reference can describe an employee as special as a piaffing horse which means that with all the activity there is little or no forward progression.
I once read a reference that after deciphering red like this ;The above mentioned person started in our employment from the bottom and from there he went downwards, he now reached rock bottom and started to dig, he has good manners and a relaxed attitude he seldom open his mouth and when he does, it is only to change which ever foot was previously in it. he works well as an individual or with others ( that follow him out of curiosity what will he do or not do next), Mr so and so made many friends in the area and he will be missed by the village folks who will have to find another Idiot.
One ex employer described a candidate depth of knowledge as deep as a car park puddle which is appropriate to all 17 year old that sell themselves as having 16 years of practical experience.
In our competitive world if an employee was one of the rare breed of rated as( triple) AAA one naturally tarnishes his/her reputation as much as possible so no one will bother to take him/her on and she/he will stay at the present job with you , on the other hand the one that drove you mad for the past 4 years there is not a greater pleasure as inflicting him upon your arch competitor that regularly poached your best staff, let him employ the unemployable , a well deserved punishment.
One Top Competitor relayed the following story relating to staff reliability .He was about to leave the yard for an extended competing excursion on the continent, his senior member of staff assured him that in his absence the horses will be taken care of to the same high standard as if the Top Competitor was doing it himself . As the top Competitor intended leaving at some Godless early hour when most humans including stable personal are still sound a sleep, he promised to leave the staff wages in the yard in a safe place .
Few days later he received a telephone call from an agitated Senior member of staff conveying to the Top Competitor how displeased every one is because no wages were found as promised.
The Top Competitor interrupted the agitated senior member of staff and said “one thing at a time please , are all the horses ok have they been groomed and cared for”
“Absolutely” the Senior member of staff assured him “horses has been taken care of excellently they are all gleaming and shining from care and attention”
On the other side The Top Competitor hummed for a moment and said “And you cant find the wages I left ??? straaange!! I left it in a brown envelop and placed it in the grooming kit among the brushes”
The following comments posted on Face Book by yards owners describe the situation to perfection,
“Has anyone designed a clever checklist to help manage yard staff? Or does anyone have any ideas to make sure jobs get done without nagging?”
“We have to oversee everything i'm afraid!”
“If you have to nag then you need to go on a bollocking course! Lo”
A (triple) AAA employees do exist but they are seldom available on the free market due to their UNIX character and skills ,instead those that reply to the staff wanted adverts belong to the tribe that mostly work only if cornered like rats in a trap, they come with a glowing reference which is the only way for their previous employer to pass them on.
The new employers must use an enigma deciphering machine to understand the true message behind the reference .
Here are some real life examples
A typical reference will describe a person as wise and energetic what it will omit to mention is that it is wisdom of youth and energy of old age, or of the one that regularly sets himself (low) standards and still fails to achieve them, I suppose it is better then the employee that completes all tasks to HIS own satisfaction .
In equestrian terms a reference can describe an employee as special as a piaffing horse which means that with all the activity there is little or no forward progression.
I once read a reference that after deciphering red like this ;The above mentioned person started in our employment from the bottom and from there he went downwards, he now reached rock bottom and started to dig, he has good manners and a relaxed attitude he seldom open his mouth and when he does, it is only to change which ever foot was previously in it. he works well as an individual or with others ( that follow him out of curiosity what will he do or not do next), Mr so and so made many friends in the area and he will be missed by the village folks who will have to find another Idiot.
One ex employer described a candidate depth of knowledge as deep as a car park puddle which is appropriate to all 17 year old that sell themselves as having 16 years of practical experience.
In our competitive world if an employee was one of the rare breed of rated as( triple) AAA one naturally tarnishes his/her reputation as much as possible so no one will bother to take him/her on and she/he will stay at the present job with you , on the other hand the one that drove you mad for the past 4 years there is not a greater pleasure as inflicting him upon your arch competitor that regularly poached your best staff, let him employ the unemployable , a well deserved punishment.
One Top Competitor relayed the following story relating to staff reliability .He was about to leave the yard for an extended competing excursion on the continent, his senior member of staff assured him that in his absence the horses will be taken care of to the same high standard as if the Top Competitor was doing it himself . As the top Competitor intended leaving at some Godless early hour when most humans including stable personal are still sound a sleep, he promised to leave the staff wages in the yard in a safe place .
Few days later he received a telephone call from an agitated Senior member of staff conveying to the Top Competitor how displeased every one is because no wages were found as promised.
The Top Competitor interrupted the agitated senior member of staff and said “one thing at a time please , are all the horses ok have they been groomed and cared for”
“Absolutely” the Senior member of staff assured him “horses has been taken care of excellently they are all gleaming and shining from care and attention”
On the other side The Top Competitor hummed for a moment and said “And you cant find the wages I left ??? straaange!! I left it in a brown envelop and placed it in the grooming kit among the brushes”
