Flossy is well known to many on the British Dressage Forum as a teller of interesting stories and perhaps the odd joke or two. We have selected a few tales for your pleasure.

Circles

Ask any uninformed person which dressage movement is the most difficult and challenging to most riders?. For sure the answer will be , Piaffe, Pirouettes, Extended trot ( for the over 50s definitely) etc, in reality it is none of these movements. Ask any Senior or Old Trainers and they will all confirm THAT it is the execution of the humble CIRCLE that foxes most aspiring dressage riders. The moment I ask any of my pupils to perform a 20 metres circle their artistic tendencies come into effect and the shape produced, vary from a squashed lemon to a fried egg sunny side up , with no resemblance to the harmonious smoothly shaped geometrically round figure of the circle. The more technically qualified the pupil is in his other life, more bizarre are the circles he produces in the dressage arena. It was an ARCHITECT student of mine that brought to my attention that a circle consists of 7 corners and 15 straight lines joined by endless dots, the rumour is that it was him that designed the “LONDON EYE” . It is actually a fact that the cog wheel was invented by a dressage rider in the 15th century . The said rider was so fed up hearing his trainer ,Monsieur Pluvinle , repeatedly SHOUTING “ROUNDER, ROUNDER ! make it look like a WHEEL. The next day the frustrated rider presented his trainer with a drawing of the cog wheel, claiming that this is what a wheel looks like , obviously at that time the instructor had no way of challenging his student as the round wheel was not invented yet , it was only in later years that mankind realised the other advantages that the cog wheel offered in the fields of technology and industry. A fellow Senior Trainer was at the end of his tether, the whole fabric of the long term relationship he built over the last 49 years with this Dressage Diva and her Dressage Husband, was in real jeopardy. Just one more shout “THIS IS NOT A CIRCLE!!!” and the Dressage Husband of this Diva would go into irrevocable decline , due to the expected consequences of the journey home. If he allowed his feeling, towards this lady’s inaptitude to perform a 20 meter circle, to be fully expressed, leaving the EU would be our smallest problem. He tried a new tactic “Listen!!” he said “A 20 METERS CIRCLE consist of 360 degrees all the same size!” After several fruitless tries he addressed the Diva in his best UKCC tone of voice. “OK LETS MAKE IT EASIER , Go and ride a small circle but keep in your mind a circle has 360 degrees ALL THE same size “ At that moment the Dressage Diva halted next to him and with a look of victory on her face she said “ IT CAN’T BE 360 IT IS A SMALLER CIRCLE!!”