Flossy is well known to many on the British Dressage Forum as a teller of interesting stories and perhaps the odd joke or two. We have selected a few tales for your pleasure.
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Thinking about sex
Senior Trainer was woken up by the telephone ringing , there is nothing unusual in being woken up by the telephone ringing it happens to him often often , during a lesson, in the middle of dinner party or a watching TV only this time it was at midnight when he was in bed.
On the other side was the Dressage Diva , the one that bought the black stallion from him . Since that unfortunate day that she collected the stallion from his yard Senior Trainer had little sleep or free time, he never thought that she would take him literally when his parting words were “ANY TIME YOU HAVE ANY PROBLEM YOU GIVE ME A CALL ” . Before he finished saying it he realised what a life changing mistake it was .
“WHAT IS IT THIS TIME ?“ he asked , hoping it is not another questions about the latest BD proposal to restructure the qualification criteria's of the halt only (rising optional) bronze level championship.
“Well” Dressage Diva started “for heaven sake woman get on with it “ Senior Trainer thought to himself “I am not British Airways cabin staff I am not here to SERVE any where any time even if I did bloody say so”
“Well” she continued “ That black stallion you sold me ONLY THINKS ABOUT SEX ,he has only one thing on his mind , it is Sally the Shetland with rug with out rug wearing the new body hugger the Miasuki bodysuit, competing, training or working in before a test , HE WILL NOT STOP THINKING ABOUT SEX, I tried every thing ,Regumate and regulate , no sex lotion, work hard potion but he still ONLY THINKS ABOUT SEX ,is there any thing else I can do?”
There was a long silence on the other side and then Senior Trainer said “ Have you tried calling him from your mobile phone the moment he shows these inclinations?”
“WHAT !!! do you think a phone call will put him off sex ?” The Dressage Diva sounded surprised .
“Well madam I know it HAS THAT EFFECT OVER ME, good night!!”