Flossy is well known to many on the British Dressage Forum as a teller of interesting stories and perhaps the odd joke or two. We have selected a few tales for your pleasure.
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Do as you do
Does any body remember the summer of 2012, the time that the sport of dressage was at its lowest image in the eyes of a large group of horse lovers.
pictures and opinions were posted all over the internet on dedicated social websites , high lighting the depravity of dressage , individual riders were hounded , their reputation smeared and life made hell by all sort of groups affiliated to the world organization of EQUIMARITANS .
Just a few years later and there is no hint of any of the troubles that dogged the sport of dressage in the so near past. Again Dressage riders are able to walk un protected with their un helmeted heads held high, any where they want.
It seems that the fundamentalists groups of EQUIMARITANS has redirected their efforts towards other pressing causes around the world leaving the Sport of Dressage to its own devices.
For those that ask how this change and transformation happened in such short time , what was kept as a top secret can now be revealed.
It was during the European championship in Denmark while one of the high profile targeted riders was walking his horse on a long loose reins , the working in arena was suddenly surrounded by zillions of frantic individuals all waving blue tokens indicating they were not there by accident, shouting at the high profile rider “WE ARE HERE WE ARE WATCHING YOU” the one that seemed to be a leader of this grouped added “ ANY THING YOU WILL DO TO THIS HORSE I WILL DO TO YOU” with the following tribe chanting “ ANY THING YOU WILL DO TO THIS HORSE SHE WILL DO TO YOU AND WE TOO” ,cameras, recorders, all modern technical equipment at the ready.
The targeted rider kept walking his horse on long loose reins totally un moved, he stopped by a group of other riders exchanged few private words and proceeded to the centre of the arena, dismounted walked to the rear end of his horse and in the most gentle affectionate manner slid his hand between the rear cheeks of his horse’s ARSE all the way up to the corrugated round orifice inserted his ungloved finger, withdrew it in a slow deliberate move, raised it to his nose, inhaled the aroma and shouted to the other group of riders “YOU WERE RIGHT GUYS THIS HORSE NEEDS CHANGING HIS DIET” .
And then he turned towards the surrounding spectators who miraculously vanished into thin air.