Flossy is well known to many on the British Dressage Forum as a teller of interesting stories and perhaps the odd joke or two. We have selected a few tales for your pleasure.

Special horse

The Olympics are over and it is an opportunity for all those that wish to own a bit of history to do so,
On the market available to purchase for the sporting connoisseurs any thing from a bit of Greenwich dirt with arena surface to a top of the range all singing and dancing Olympic horse, what ever you fancy it is there for the highest bidder.
One wealthy sporting enthusiast fancied for himself one of them high stepping quick turning horses that took part in what he thought was the Olympic MASSAGE competition .
He ended in the yard of a well known dealer from the Emerald island who guaranteed he could find him the special horse to amaze and impress all his mates.
Unfortunately the job was more difficult then even an Irish dealer expected, one by one, horses were turned down, one because the colour did not match with his mistresses hair, the other reminded him to much of his wife and so horse after horse were rejected.
The last horse to be displayed was a plain looking equine with a rubbed mane and chowed tail but according to the dealer he was special “THIS HORSE CAN SPEAK”
The prospective purchaser in disbelief approached the scraggly looking animal and started a conversation , and sure as the day is long this horse could speak in a clear accent less English.
After preliminary questions the horse started to tell his life story.
According to him he was born on a small farm in the south of the country, from foal hood he was already very special winning top competitions in all disciplines, culminating in the most convincing win in the Olympic games and that was only his sporting achievements his successes in the world of academia and arts are just as impressive.
That was the horse for him never mind the MASSAGE lark that's a horse in a million.
He asked the dealer for the price and was surprised to find out he only wanted £200 for this special speaking horse.
“WHY SO CHEEP” he asked
“because this horse is such a liar he never did any of the things he says, in matter of fact he never left the farm ever” replied the dealer.