Cycling shorts

Lady Suckley was having her weekly lesson with Marco DeGrabber. She strode boldly into the arena on her £500k Toto look alike and Marco lowered his sunglasses ready to see past the dazzle of bling that glittered from every part of tack and riding apparel possible. As Lady Suckley rode past he was surprised to see that instead of her top of the range made to measure black saddle with diamonds rivets , extra high pommel, extra high cantle, extra large knee blocks (and extra high price) she was riding in an old battered SHOWING saddle that was flatter than Bluey the cob's trot and wider than Sally Shitlands barrel. She was slipping and sliding from pommel to cantle, showing complete insensitivity to the horses movement . Marco , for once in a tone of voice showing interest in Lady Suckley, asked “Why are you riding like this ? WHATS THE PROBLEM ??” Not known to be shy LS explained in details , that she is only following the advice from members of BD forum and it must be the VASALINE that causes her to slip and slide and the EMLA cream , why she could not feel whether she was in the saddle or out of it . Marco DeGrabber in his most professional voice replied “ DON’T LISTEN TO THESE NUMPTIES FROM THE FORUM, I KNOW THE REMEDY FOR PROBLEMS LIKE THIS!!” LS gave him one of her aristocratic looks and replied " Noooo chance Marco, you can forget whatever it is you are thinking of. I LEFT MY PADDED CYCLING SHORTS AT HOME!”