Flossy is well known to many on the British Dressage Forum as a teller of interesting stories and perhaps the odd joke or two. We have selected a few tales for your pleasure.

Dutch dressage show

Dutch dressage show
I informed the wife that me and the lads are planning a week end in Holland.
“What for ?” she asked.
“for a bit of drinking and shopping” was my reply.
The wife again ”Drinking is not good for you and you don’t like spending money shopping “
“Its only going to be WINDOW shopping “ I said
“Don’t be so stupid woman that will F,,, the whole week end !!” was my INSTINCTIVE REACTION,
“That’s exactly why” she continued “ IT will insure it’s the only thing that will get F,,.. this week end”.
This is how I ended at the Rotterdam CDI and a good show it was, apart from a small issue of public lavatories.
It seems that the Dutch people are equipped with a very large and strong bladder , not only that the number of loos per capita was well below an acceptable number, those that were available were shared by both men and women.
The lavatories intentionally were well hidden from the public a ploy that did not work as one only had to join one of the mile long queues that mushroomed around the show ground all leading to a cabin housing a unisex loos.
At my age I can live with the idea that the person in the cubical next to me is of the opposite sex, let be honest most of us has don’t worse things with the opposite sex , some even with the same sex.
What really got me was the URINALS , The URINALS were positioned at a height that , even a guy like me of an average height who wears regular size breeches and regular size boots etc, in order to reach the URINALS I had to stand on my TIP TOES .
Now before you all start laughing , remember that over a certain age the act of urinating is no longer a slap dash job, it requires a steady hand and a keen eye for an accurate aim, now doing all that while standing on one’s TIP TOES with a line of edgy women queuing behind you all muttering in a strange language something incoherent to you, is what one can only say is a “PISSING IMPOSSIBLE”
I don’t know who designed these lavatories with the extra high urinals but I am sure that it was like the small man big car complex, on an international level .It was to remind to all the foreign visitors that Holland may be a small country but this does not apply to the average DUTCHMAN .