Flossy is well known to many on the British Dressage Forum as a teller of interesting stories and perhaps the odd joke or two. We have selected a few tales for your pleasure.

Dog issues

Any follower  of British Dressage  forum  can’t miss  the non-horsy  threads, they clearly confirms  THAT   when a BD member reaches the emotional stage in their life where a true companion is  required, one to cuddle ,to love and take to bed with on cold  British nights  , the choice is a  dog.  The boys   in general  prefer  a sausage  dog  and the girls  most likely a  terrier ,  although recently   more exotic breeds   are becoming popular with the British dressage fraternity .
This trend  is in total contrast to the continental attitude where a mistress  , a lover  or toy boy  are the  answer   for   loneliness  and  the  longing  for a  true love.
However  “owning   a dog”   SORRY  CORRECTING MY SELF  “sharing a life with a dog”  does not come without its problems,
Look at this extract from the forum     “Our cocker spaniel who is 9yo, had for the past few years a skin issue, he scratches his legs, ears and neck and bites at his  (had to delete this bit)   ETC ETC ETC   she goes on to explain that so far no vet came up with a cure for this  condition.”
Excuse me  madam  the answer is staring you in the face  how can’t you see it.  Spaniels  are meant to be wet dirty and smelly  (not that you will notice),  sleeping  on a   flee infested  bed of straw next to a pile of shit   to roll in whenever  they feel the need to do so.
The clean bed  with silk sheets  in the temperature controlled room where you and your dog spends  quality time together  is the  un natural habitat for  any dog let alone  a Spaniel   “YOUR DOG IS SUFFERING FROM EMOTIONAL AND PHISICAL  ALERGIC REACTION TO DOMESTICATION”.
My friend  plump lady  was at  her wits end , in spite  of following forumists  advice and  resorting to this recipe  of  feeding  the   “ Minced lamb, turkey, chicken, pork, or beef with three cups organic whole brown rice, organic chicken/beef stock plus water (total 6 cups), Rosemary, with frozen or fresh vegetables mixed in, cooked 45 minutes...  added  flax, garlic, Brewer’s yeast with hardboiled egg as well  ,    her husband’s  COCKER  id still itchy  and her CIHWAWA   is covered  with raw  patches of skin.
Plump  lady  mind was so occupied with this  dog problems  that  it started to take its toll on her riding.  Her trainer  noticed   that  her riding is  suffering from a lack of concentration  and focus ,    every day she is riding worse and  worse , to day she already riding like next week  “WHATS THE MATTER ?”  he asked her .
 “MY CIHWAWA   is so sore, the skin is  so sensitive  whatever I do or rub on it  makes no difference”  she replied.
“That’s   does not explain   about  forgetting your test  only   WHY  YOU CANT DO SITTING TROT!  ” he  summed up .