Flossy is well known to many on the British Dressage Forum as a teller of interesting stories and perhaps the odd joke or two. We have selected a few tales for your pleasure.

FEI Making the sport popular

Junior  Trainer  requested that Old Trainer   will  join him    in a trip to the FEI   convention.
“It is an important   international  conference  called by the FEI  to  debate  and consider the way forward  for the sport of Dressage”  Junior  told  Old Trainer.
He continued  “ We   need people  like you  with the knowledge  of the past , present  and hopefully some insight  to  the future”  TO GUIDE THE SPORT IN TRHE  RIGHT DIRECTION.
Old  Trainer  respond was   “Waste  of TIME ”
“No!  No! “  Junior Trainer  replied         “  it is an   opportunity    to put our   ideas  forward   of  how to make Dressage more popular  and interesting to the larger public”.
“Waste  of TIME”   Old Trainer   repeated himself.
After  a lot of arm  twisting,   endless  badgering  and   not insignificant  amount of flattering,   Old Trainer  agreed   to join  Junior Trainer  on the trip up to London     to the convention,   with one stipulation , “ if  the conference  looks like  with  genuine  agenda he  will stay, however  if  it turns to the USUAL    Moochytietsing  kind of  Debate  , FIVE MINUTES  ON THE CLOCK   AND   OLD Trainer is  OUT , He has got better  things to do  with his time.
 
Junior and  Old  trainers  entered  the hall ,  the sounds  reverberating around  were  like  from  the tower of Babylon, people from all over the world  congregated  to debate  and consider how to   turn     a MINORITY  sport  to MEDIA  and  masses  FRIENDLY.
As  the two of them  were taking their allocated seats  in the middle row  , Old Trainer   reminded Junior  that    “THE CLOCK  is ticking   ,I am not staying longer than needed  it is all  Waste  of TIME”
 
The convention  was opened by the FEI  marketing  and promotion    director  ,   high lightening   how much the FEI would appreciate  the opinion of the stake  holder   in these crucial times.  Before he finished  a sentence someone shouted  from the back of the room  “THEY SHOULD RIDE  TOPLESS  their  personalities  comes out better”
The marketing and promotion director vetoed   it  down    as in-appropriate  for a sport aiming to encompass  all cultures  and age groups.
Old  Trainer was  heard by those close by  “ I am watching the CLOCK”  , With Junior Trainer  doing his best to muffle his  words   , to no avail .
The marketing and promotion  director  raised  his hand and asked   “WHAT DID HE SAY??”
“Nothing  relevant “  Junior  replied.
And then the voice from the back  “THEY SHOULD RIDE  TOPLESS  their  personalities  comes out better”
“Shut up!!  Sit down ! we heard you first time!” was the respond  from the other delegates.
With  Old trainer  repeating again  “ I am watching the CLOCK”   with the Marketing and promotion director inquiring what was said  and junior  again doing his best to muffle his  words   as irrelevant.
 
Ideas  from the floor came thick and fast  . Shorten the test, lengthen the test, colour co-ordinated   HALT   to  the music, single movement only test   etc. etc. etc. 
And in between every  suggestion   the voice from the back  “THEY SHOULD RIDE  TOPLESS”  with  the following  reaction  from the floor “Shut up!!  Sit down ! we heard you first time!” 
Old trainer predictably   “ I am watching the CLOCK”   with the Marketing and promotion director inquiring what was said  and junior   doing his best to muffle his  words   as irrelevant.
After  suggestion  number 1422.5,  was rejected by the   committee , Old  Trainer  stood up  looked at Junior pointed  at his wrist and  said   “ CLOCK”   this time the  marketing and promotion  director    heard  it loud and clear, he pointed  at  Old Trainer  looked at all  the present  people and  said   “THIS IS  THE FIRSE GREAT  IDEA I HEARD TODAY !!!!” .
And the rest  ladies   and gentlemen   is History . ( Why we have  dressage  tests against the clock)
 
Epilogue;
On the way out  of the conference hall  Junior  Trainer could not   avoid hearing a conversation  between to foreign  delegates  ,one asking  the other  “Gustie ,   do you remember  in days gone by  before  the current trend of wearing  crash helmets     what was the head gear  used  in those days  called?”
“TOP HAT, TOP HAT”  Was the reply
“Ahaa    yes     you   are correct  it is   not “ TOPLESS”   Gustie  said