Flossy is well known to many on the British Dressage Forum as a teller of interesting stories and perhaps the odd joke or two. We have selected a few tales for your pleasure.

Words

The latest  move by the FEI to change the wordings  for the collective marks  at the bottom of the score sheet   is well over due . One does not have to be a sport psychologist  or a literature  expert to know that a miss placed word  with  a possibility  for double meaning   or ambiguity   can deliver a completely  different message then the   writer’s  intention.
For example :   some years ago  about     10  BC     Jennie Loriston Clark  was asked  on a TV   interview  what was her secret  for  producing such a good tune from  her  horse  , the reply was   “it is all in the relationship, I live eat and sleep with my horse and he would do anything for me” . The interviewer raise his  eyes brow looked at the people around and said  “That’s animal for you,  I have been doing the same with my wife   for 23 years  but it does not seem to have the same effect”.
When  Ulla  Salzgeber   was asked the same question   in a press conference ,  her reply was  exactly the same  “  IT  IZ  IN  ZEE  RREELATIONSHIP”    with her husband  quietly   slinking   under the table trying to make himself invisible as possible.
So  just like  TWO   liberal  party politicians   with THREE opinions   , one word   can  have  THREE different  meanings.
That’s the reason  why  it is important that  the FEI  gets it right this time and  choose a word   that will express the judges message  as   he meant  it  , in a clear manner  .
This word must mean something to everybody and offend nobody , to my knowledge there is only one word in the equestrian vocabulary   that fits into that roll,  IT  is the German   expression   “Ach-so”  some time for clarity  it is  shortened to simple “so”  (pronounced  “ZZZO”)
This  word has such versatility  that it can convey any possible equestrian  message  without ambiguity  .
For instance;  A German trainer   with very little command of the English language  is able to conduct a  three month  training clinic  during the Florida  winter FESTIVAL  without   the  use of any other  word apart from the  “SO”  pronounced  “ZZO”.
A student  preforming  a half pass with some loss  of something  ,  the trainer responds is  a little   “zo”  indicating for the movement to be repeated  AGAIN ,  this time   with little more “ZZO”  with the trainer’s responds to this   is  a bigger “ZZZO!!”
Obviously  there is the   occasion that  after several “Zzos”  it requires the trainer to hop on  top  of  the  horse  and prove  to the mistrusting student that the trainer  can actually   perform  as well as he talks , after  a 2 minute ride in which  the trainer  executed all the  GPS movements to perfection ,  he would halt next to the  student and with a sharp pat on the horses neck  exclaim  “ZZO!!!!”   you see !!.
The number of situations  that this word can be used effectively is endless   but it is worth mentioning  one more scenario  in which this words  sum-up everything that a trainer may ever want to say   which is   “ACH-ZZZzzzoooo”  which means   “THANK GOD YOU GOT IT AT LAST   I thought we were going to be here until tomorrow”.