Flossy is well known to many on the British Dressage Forum as a teller of interesting stories and perhaps the odd joke or two. We have selected a few tales for your pleasure.

Globalization effect

Globalization effect
 
With the FEI new policy  of opening  dressage to countries,  new and old  big or small,  came few unexpected situations.
One of the  incidents during the Hickstead CDI   brought to light  how similar an international  dressage show is to the Tower of babylon   and what a long term effect  it may have over dressage.
 
During   the CDI  it was noticed how  a Top Competitor’s style of riding  and horse’s   way of going changed.
Over the   day’s   Top Competitor’s  horses developed a slight swinging motion of  the  hind legs  ,not up and down but left and right, from test to test that swing increased and grew until  the free style  performance resembled  a traditional Caribbean   love dance.
To spectators and other competitors  it was a great source of amusement  and they applauded  Top Competitor  for  sexing  up   and making dressage more amusing .
To his Trainer  it was constant annoyance and frustration  , he approached him  after one test  and bellowed
“WHAT THE    F,,,,,K  are you doing  , what happened to straightness,  steady lines    and hind leg control  we have been working on all these years  , soon you will even go Dutch “.
Top Competitor  reply was  “ I am only trying to do what the    Foreign  international JUDGES WANT TO SEE, look at my   score sheets  they repeatedly say  “ ,     “  more Twerking   required,  horse not twerking  up   , twerk up  twerk up  for higher marks”,  every 2nd comments was   about   horse not Twerking up .
“I am only trying to  show what the judges  want to see   AS YOU TOUGHT ME” Top Competitor replied.
Senior Trainer, being nearly old trainer,  walked away   in disgust muttering  to himself   “and they think that Totilas judging  is a dressage  CRISIS”
In the evening  during the informal cocktail  party   the  Senior  Judge  was approached by an international  judges from  an Amazon  tribe   that immerged  unexpectedly  from the rainforest  for the first time last year.
The  new judge  asked   the  Senior  Judge  for some help with  English  equestrian    expressions.    His question was           “ what is the correct terminology for describing  the activity  of the horse’s hind legs when they step forward well under the body   of the horse  with the hind legs  foot prints   well over the foot prints of the front legs  ?”.
“Tracking up  or over tracking”   was the Senior Judge’s  reply .
The latest  recruit to the FRI  judges  panel  pondered    for a moment and then said   “So it is not   TWERKING”