Flossy is well known to many on the British Dressage Forum as a teller of interesting stories and perhaps the odd joke or two. We have selected a few tales for your pleasure.

Tone of voice

Dressage Husband was  by the arena side  during  a British Dressage clinic    in which his  wife was  one of the students, the clinic  was taken by  a well known  Senior Trainer .
As  Dressage Diva  was occupied  and focused on  Senior Trainers guiding exercises  , Dressage Husband  had  the  time to ponder  and mull over  the reality of being married  to a Dressage Diva, he just hoped that when the time comes  his wife will show as much concern   to  his welfare  as the concern she has for  her elderly dogs physical and emotional needs.
And then   Senior Trainer addressed  Dressage Diva   “Madam you have given the exercise” down the centre” a completely new definition and meaning   you have taken a geometrical principle  known  to mankind  for years  and changed it to todays cyber world to be totally unrecognizable  by normal humans  let alone  dressage  judges , CAN WE PLEASE COME DOWN  some where near  THE MIDDLE OF THE ARENA”.
Dressage husband by the side of the arena talking to himself  “And we had to drive 4 hours , pay £80 + VAT , miss the rugby    and   eat  greasy  burgers  to be told this  ”.
Some time later Senior Trainer commented about  Dressage Diva seat  and  body posture  , and in his usual descriptive style tried to convey to his student  that her action in the saddle can be construed as   abusive to saddles and offensive to leather work   and more appropriate  in a pole dancing  tournament  then a dressage  competition”.
Dressage Husband  by the arenas side again mumbling  to himself  “you should consider yourself privileged  I don't get to see her   move in this manner EVER”
And then it was heard from the far end of the arena  in a shrill   full  of personal agony   “DEERRRRIIICCCCCK   SHUUUT  UUUPPP you are doing my head INNN   !!!”
Senior Trainer in complete surprise  turned to the Dressage Husband and with a sympathetic voice  asked “Is that her usual   tone of voice ?” 
 
“Oho  no “ Dressage Husband said  “she only speaks like this when I am around”