Flossy is well known to many on the British Dressage Forum as a teller of interesting stories and perhaps the odd joke or two. We have selected a few tales for your pleasure.

Ahorse caled Heaven

 Junior rider    was one of the most popular  riders on the dressage scene , well at least until he won the prestigious  BD “ Halt and immobility”   championship  and then his popularity some what diminished  as his true character , of  an ambitious  stop at nothing  pot hunter , came to light .
He was loved by  men women and husbands, each kind found a different reason  for their   feelings  towards Junior  Trainer.   Men , well this is obvious , women, no  it is not obvious  but it is so often the case  and husbands as the old saying says “who cares where one gets  the apatite    as long that  one  eats at home” .
Junior Trainer’s    mount    for  this memorable championship was a big Black  14 yo  gelding of non de script  breeding   , owned by his boss Senior Trainer , aptly named Heaven  (the horse) .
Heaven was most suitable for this kind of demanding competition , where  complete  equine concentration  for  the full duration  of the halt  is required, fortunately non of his fan club or judges new that   Heaven’s preferred pace was actually  the halt  and the challenging part for his rider  always been  how to get him  down the centre,  to the required  spot,  within the time allowed .
Heavens  like many top competition horses had many gears  which  in his case  were ;  halt, immobility,   complete immobility  and a perfect stand still.  
As always in these situation  horse and rider developed  a bond  ,  a complete harmony and trust between horse and rider, the horse knew that this rider will never succeed to push him out of his preferred pace  and the rider new that what ever may be the situation this horse will never get out of this preferred  pace, very comforting thought when one   is only a junior  rider at his first ever championship.
With dressage’s “ Halt  immobility”  competitions  becoming so popular among  BD membership,  horses with  Heaven’s talent   were in big demands and commanded big money on the open market.
Senior  Trainer’s plans were  to take over the ride from Junior  one day , when “Halt   immobility” competitions  would open up  for senior riders too and   not  kept   restricted for  grass root riders only , However when an offer that could not be refused came  he had to let Heaven go.
Knowing  of the bond between   Junior  and the best horse he ever rode,  the  deal and the departure of the horse all took place when   Junior   rider  was   away out of the yard, on his return he straight  away went to  Heavens box to offer him    an apple and a cuddle ,  he turned to  the nearest  girl  and asked  “do you know where Heaven is?”   no reply,  just the customary working pupil vacant look  of total disassociation  from this world. He walked towards  the indoor school , maybe  the boss implemented the take over earlier then planned  ,  no Heaven there  either .  He shouted at the top of his voice “WHERE IS Heaven”  to which there was no acknowledgement  from any body present that the question was even registered .  By now  Junior had the feeling that some thing is not quit right, even at his top speed, for the time  Junior  was absent,  Heaven could not have been more then  just  few yards from his stable, “DO YOU KNOW WHERE IS HEAVEN ?”  he turned to the latest recruit of the yard   Seniors Trainer’s  assistant rider ,  a Gorgeously looking German  girl   that just realizes that   the UK dressage scene  is the place to learn dressage  but not    where  a husband  will be easily found.
She  signalled to  Junior  to follow her  and proceeded  to march to wards the barn  situated at the end of the yard   Junior following in anticipation , there  just as Junior   caught up with  her, she   laid on one of the large hay bales  spread her legs wide open and  in a strong German accent  said to  Junior  “HERE  IS WHERE HEAVEN IS”