Flossy is well known to many on the British Dressage Forum as a teller of interesting stories and perhaps the odd joke or two. We have selected a few tales for your pleasure.

How to handle FEI steward

How to handle an FEI steward
The working in arena was busy, all the riders working were focused and concentrating , The FEI steward kept control over his little kingdom ,equipped with measuring tape, diagram and a rule book size of the encyclopaedia Britannica , he saw and noticed every move of every rider within the confines of the arena.
His attention was drawn to one particular rider, not that this rider did any thing contravening the rules  but the steward new he will  given a chance.
No one new a potential RK rist better then him, he was not not made with a finger as my granny used to say , he was not an FEI steward for his good looks, he had a job to do and he will do it .
The singled out rider rode beautifully , both his horse and him were the epitome of FEI athletic happiness , the steward new it is only matter of time ,” this style of riding could not continue for a whole hour” the steward assured his assistance, “no one can keep a horse IFOV for a whole training session let alone him, dont you worry our new laser measuring apparatus will come in use patience is a virtue” and then he walked towards the targeted rider stopped him in mid work and said in a loud enough voice to be heard by the judges on the other side of the show ground “LOOK YOU !!!  I AM WATCHING YOUR EVERY MOVE, ANY THING YOU WILL DO TO THIS HORSE WHICH IS NOT IN THE FEI BOOK I WILL PERSONALLY DO TO YOU” .
The exhaustipated rider took a deep breath dismounted, went to the rear of the horse lifted its tail and planted a passionate kiss where the sun never shine and turned to the FEI steward and said “I was not competing to day any way  but you  said   you  can     kiss  my   a,,,,,,,,,,,, any way,”
To those that are not familiar with the English language “exhaustipated “ means to tired to give a shit